Show of the Week

Someone Still Loves You Boris Yeltsin, Jan. 28, 9 p.m. at Empty Bottle

In the pantheon of poorly named bands, Someone Still Loves You Boris Yeltsin check in somewhere between Arctic Monkeys and Shit Robot. But SSLYBY transcend their stupid moniker to create upbeat, catchy indie rock. This show, at Empty Bottle (which means you have to be 21, but whatever) stands out for two reasons: there are a Kremlin-load of bands I’ve never heard of opening and it’s free. Yes, this is a free show. No money. For quality music. You’ll be there late (SSLYBY won’t take the stage until midnight), but sleeping through your 9 a.m. class will totally be worth it.

Best of the Rest

Hot Water Music, Feb. 1 and 2, 8 and 6:30 p.m. respectively at Metro

I first discovered Hot Water Music via Emogame, a delightful Flash romp through the world of angsty music. I didn’t pay much attention to the band, as I was too captivated by using Connor Oberst’s special attack to destroy Hot Topic employees. Ahhh, the golden summer of my youth. Anyway, Hot Water Music is kinda emo, but also kinda hardcore, and suprisingly good. Tickets are sold out but, by golly, when I got caught in the fingerbang mini-game in Emogame, I didn’t give up, and neither should you.

(As you can see, this is a thin week for live music. Sucks, don’t it? On to the hate!)

Avoid at all Costs

Cobra Starship, Jan. 28 and 29, 6:30 p.m. at Subterranean

Yes, they did the Snakes on a Plane song. Your future doesn’t bode well when the biggest accomplishment on your resume is “hit song from total fiasco of a film starring Samuel L. Jackson.” I’m stunned they have more songs than the “OH, I’m ready for it,” business. Tickets are sold out…what the heck Chicago? Get these MOTHAFUCKIN POSEURS OFF MY MOTHAFUCKIN CHICAGO MUSIC SCENE.

(I’m so sorry)