Marisa’s abroad in Madrid, Spain, until Dec. 19.

It doesn’t feel like I’m about to hop on a plane to Madrid for the semester. Maybe that’s because I have to get on a plane to LA and then another one to Newark before I can even think about getting on that Madrid flight. Someone seriously needs to invent teleporters. But regardless, it just doesn’t feel real. It’s sort of like when you say a word over and over and it starts to sound weird, like it’s not actually a word (please tell me I’m not alone on this one). I’ve been telling everyone about my study abroad plans, and people keep asking when I’m leaving, but I’ve repeated the answers so many times that it doesn’t even feel like I’m going at all.

Or maybe I’m just delirious from packing. Not that I’ve accomplished much, besides watching the last two episodes of The Hills (such a horribly guilty pleasure) in between folding piles of shirts. Fortunately, I can now rest easy knowing that Brody is out of jail and Lauren and Audrina are friends again (no, I’m not serious). Unfortunately, I have nothing packed and I’m leaving at 6 a.m.

In fact, I’m beginning to feel pretty unprepared in general. I finally got around to reading the last study abroad handbook my program sent us (there have been at least three that I’m aware of), and I suddenly realized that I should have been brushing up on my Spanish this entire summer. Whoops. I’m sort of hoping it will all come flooding back once I get there and have to actually communicate with people. I’ve also spent the last few days running around like a madwoman trying to get last-minute items that I probably should have been thinking about weeks ago. Oh, and I found out yesterday that I’m supposed to start reading a book called The New Spaniards. Maybe it’s like “One Book, One Northwestern” and I don’t actually have to read it. Guess I’ll add that to my plane ride to-do list just in case. All of this procrastination has left me feeling more anxious than I should. So far, I am completely failing at being a model study abroad student for all of you.

Luckily, my building apprehension seems to be momentarily balanced out by that sense of disconnect I described with that crappy word repetition metaphor earlier. I’m not so much excited as I am ready to just get going already, and since it doesn’t feel real, there’s no reason for me to be nervous yet. Once I meet up with my group on the flight to Madrid, and especially once I touch down in Spain, I have a feeling that reality will come crashing down on me and I’ll be either petrified or pumped, or both. Until then, I’m trying to be zen about this whole thing as I attempt to cram way too many pairs of shoes into my suitcase and try to avoid psyching myself out as I realize that I can’t even remember simple phrases in Spanish. Thank you, Northwestern Spanish Department. I guess that’s what my new Spanish dictionary is for. Speaking of which… I should probably pack that.

Ugh so much to do! I should probably stop blogging (procrastinating) and get some serious packing done. Next time you hear from me, I’ll finally be in Madrid!

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