Let’s say you work at Lehman Brothers (I’m looking at you, econ majors). This hasn’t been such a great week for you, what with the stock market making scary plummeting graphs, Bank of America continuing its quest to own the entire country and John McCain insisting that your job is totally secure.

But never fear, brave investment banker! There are indeed people out there who want to comfort — nay, to help you in this time of need. All you have to do is turn to that greatest of community uniters: Craigslist.

No, seriously. A quick search for “lehman” in the Personals section of the New York Craiglist reveals that there are more than a few altruistic New Yorkers volunteering their services to console poor, frightened Lehman Brothers employees. From the man offering free “massages” to female Wall Street workers to the more straightforward requests, these good souls just want to provide a little ray of sunshine into what must be some very dark lives right now (paying for electricity is hard when you don’t have a job, after all).

And that’s Craiglist, folks: as Gawker put it, putting the “getting laid” back into “getting laid off.”