Freshman Boy, to a group of club-attired friends: Hey look, it’s 1800! Let’s go to 1800 guys! Wooo, 1800!

Grad student in MTC: That’s a lot of money to invest in yourself, with breast implants and grad school.

Freshman boy to crowd of other freshmen: Oh my god. Dude, I can’t believe you haven’t seen it! Go home and YouTube “My New Haircut.”

Presenter at the Transfer 101 Essential NU: What’s the potential danger in playing drinking games?
Audience member: Being bad at them?

Presenter at Sex Signals Essential NU: What are some stereotypes about what a man should be like?
Crowd member 1: Not bald!
Crowd member 2: Drink beer!

Mother below the banner at the Arch: Let’s take a picture.
Daughter: But it’s so ugly!

Freshman girl talking to a group of guys at crowded off-campus frat party: I’ve been told I’m a Kappa but I don’t know what that means!