Sit down and listen, I’ll tell you a tale
Of a candidate dark and another quite pale.
Both ran for president of the US of A
The media helping and paving their way.

The candidates pushed and shoved their way in
The race was decided before it could even begin.
The first man was old and seemed kind of wise
The other tried to make good, playing one of the guys.

The old one made promises that he’d stay the course
But his promises were like that which comes out of a horse.
The young one declared change was the name of the game
But what he sought to offer was just much of the same.

And so they danced on, proposing energy plans,
Traveling round and making speeches quite bland.
Both spoke their rhetoric, equally hollow
Fully expecting the people to follow.

Now the people were really not too bad of folk
Though a habit of borrowing had left them flat broke.
For across the sea in the land of the dragon,
Their debt piled so high, had to be carted by wagon.

That was their problem, a matter economical
But the coverage of it was not short of comical
On matters of finance neither man bothered to speak
And thus it was fated, the dollar stayed weak.

Instead, one took the podium, his hair white and wispy
Said if Iran gets the bomb, we’ll end up radioactively crispy
The other skirted the dollar troubles, talking with flair
About government programs and expanded health care.

Now the people, you see, had been duped all too easy
The political process had become extra-sleazy
Because how can you find any real mud to sling
When both candidates stand for the very same thing.

Whether continuing foreign involvement or heightened taxation,
Both will do nothing but burden the nation.
So come November you’ll ask and ask quick
‘Which of these candidates makes me the least sick?’

Could it be the old senator from the great desert state?
Or the young junior pol for Pres in ‘08?
But whether red pachyderm or donkey who bucked
It’s easy to see that America’s fucked.