Lost in the alcohol and Smashmouth-fueled debauchery of Dillo Day is the importance of carefully putting together an outfit that will not only make it through the day, but portray the right image. It’s easy to assume that Dillo is all about throwing on the first pinnie you find and staggering down to the Lakefill, but there is far more to it than that. Without further ado, let’s take a look at five possible shirt choices and what they may say about you.
Apparel for one of the artists actually playing at Dillo
What it says: I’m not just here to get drunk at 8 a.m., I actually care about who’s performing. But I would also like to get drunk at 8 a.m. Be wary of this choice though, because it could lead to accusations of being a hipster. Don’t pair with skinny jeans or a sense of elitism.
Apparel that strictly pertains to drinking
What it says: Does it even matter who’s playing? This is our one chance to go full-on party school and I’m going to embrace it. The beauty of this choice is that generally if you leave your room wearing a tank like this you’re either: A) too drunk to care about people’s opinions or B) the kind of person who has never cared about people’s opinions.
Vintage sports apparel
What it says: A staple of Dillo Day, a classic tank (or jersey in this case) is an easy way to show that you’re there to have a good time but don’t want to seem like a complete tool. The key here is to find the sweet spot between the obscure and the well-known. No one is going to think you’re cool if you show up to the pregame rocking a Carmelo Anthony Denver Nuggets jersy from 2008.
Your Greek tank
What it says: A safe choice if you don’t have any standout tanks or pinnies, you can always just throw on a shirt from your fraternity or sorority. Most Greek organizations make their own custom tanks for Dillo in the first place, so you’ll be able to comfortably bask in the glow of uniformity. This may not be the most game-changing move but it’ll at least make you easy to find once you devolve into a slobbering, drunken mess by 3 p.m. Be warned though because on Dillo Day, just like really any other day, no one cares which frat you’re in.
What it says: Come on, you’re better than this. Everyone knows you go to Northwestern, you aren’t impressing anyone with that tank. You might as well have just stayed inside all day if you were going to show this little effort.