“I have nothing to wear.”
Whenever there is anything of the slightest importance coming up in my life, I anxiously go through my closet and always end up saying those terrible five words. Especially in situations where making a good impression is crucial, picking out what to wear can feel like the hardest thing in life — first dates are no exception.
For the 150 NU men and women who will be participating in speed dating next week, as well as those of us who are planning, hoping or waiting for a magical first date, I hope this article can serve as a small light in the darkness. Given that you are not annoying beyond control, or extremely fugly, what you wear can make a big difference on your first impression.
FIRST DATE : SCREW GETTING READY TWO HOURS IN ADVANCE
The Golden Rule of first dates never change: Always give off the impression that you had just enough time to pencil your date in. Even if you have been waiting for this the entire week, you don’t want to show it; you’d look super desperate.
Girls, avoid looking high-maintenance. According to my scientific study (a.k.a asking my guy friends what they dislike about girls) it all came down to picking on food and looking overly made-up. Now, I’m not going to tell you how much to eat on your first date, but can I at least tell you not to look like you just jumped out of a fashion show, or worse, a theatrical performance?
Guys, shove those athletic jerseys under your bed. Quite a few guys claim that athletic jerseys are conversation starters at parties. But are you sure they serve the same function on a first date? Look, unless you are a real athlete or have an amazing body, athletic jerseys make you look like you’re wearing a colorful sack. So how about a nice shirt and a blazer instead?
SECOND DATE : TONE DOWN THAT FAKE ATTITUDE
We all cheat on a first date — not with anyone else, but we lie: about that one time (or practically every weekend) you got really drunk and only God knows what happened, about your tendency to not shower…or your penchant for farting often. If you have successfully made it through the first date, subtly but slowly give out hints of who you really are to your partner. Warning: This doesn’t mean start farting, burping and talking about drunken debaucheries with your partner on the second date.
Girls, how about something more comfortable? If, on the first date, you went through the pain of wearing shoes that squeeze your toes or a shirt that constantly reminds you to suck your tummy in, try something casual. Given that most second dates are usually longer than the first date, it might be a good idea to wear something you can breathe and walk in comfortably. Despite what you may think, sports jerseys could be a nice option as long as they fit you well (and make your boobs look big)
Guys, no, leave the jersey under your bed. That XL jersey can stay there for another good month. Instead, look for a collared shirt or a print T-shirt and track jacket in your messy closet. Unless you’re dating a nun or someone soon-to-be one, an alcohol logo print t-shirt could work well too. That way, you can casually hint to your partner that you do occasionally go to parties and have a few drinks and so on. But do hold off on that farting and burping until you feel your partner likes you enough to be able to deal with it.
THIRD DATE : GET YOUR SEXY ON
Third date is game day. It is time to take that cute movie-and-coffee date to another level. This could possibly be the day you and your date decide to do this more often or be “just friends.” If you find your date to be funny, witty and cute, now is the time to see if you’re sexually attracted to him/her too.
Girls, go for a low-cut shirt and an awesome pair of jeans that make your ass look good. Don’t get too carried away — don’t wear a shirt that has your boobs hanging outside your shirt and super low-rise jeans that moon people sitting behind you. A semi-low-cut shirt that shows a hint of your cleavage is enough.
Guys, what comes off easily and doesn’t mess your carefully waxed hair? If you’re thinking something like sweater vest, oh geez…I’m going to give you a second chance. You were thinking ‘button down!’ right? Good boy, good boy. Put on your nice clean shirt and you’re on the go!
But, whatever you decide to wear in the end, make sure you smell good and look clean. Also, be an optimist and prepare for the unexpected: shave whatever body hair you have to shave and don’t forget to wear sexy underwear. Good luck!