Fables for the 21st century and beyond: The Ant and the Grasshopper

    One summer day, a Grasshopper was lounging outside working on his tan. Whenever a lady grasshopper walked by, he would flex his wings. He never succeeded in impressing the female insects. They would only give a huff and turn away.

    Meanwhile, an Ant was inside scurrying around the office, busy being productive. He had lots of work to do, and he knew it wasn’t going to do itself. He had a colony of mouths to feed at home, and he actually enjoyed his job. He loved the excitement on his wife's and kids’ faces when he arrived home after an arduous day of work. They were quite the happy family.

    The Grasshopper was getting fatigued from lying on his back all day. So he rolled over and lay on his thorax.

    The Ant worked in the IT department for a large publishing company. He enjoyed the fresh challenges he would get every day. Today’s issue was particularly challenging: All the mouses had spontaneously stopped working. “It’s like someone is trying to teach a lesson,” he thought to himself.

    A particularly voluptuous woman grasshopper walked toward the Grasshopper. He went through the motions of his old routine, flexing his wings and giving her a thousand winks (compound eyes are extremely effective for high speed winking). To his surprise, she stopped, turned, and actually walked toward him. “I finally caught one,” he thought to himself.

    The Ant pondered the predicament. Then it hit him.

    The female grasshopper walked right up to the tanner, raising her hand as if to wave. Then she hit him.

    The Ant loved the feeling of finding solutions. That was the main reason he enjoyed his job, and why he was good at it, too.

    The Grasshopper hated the feeling of a slap. It was such a slap in the face. To his ego.

    As the day waned, the Ant felt the glow of accomplishment as he left the office and the heat of love as he was welcomed by his family.

    As the Grasshopper went inside after his day of tanning, he saw the red glow of his sunburn and felt the heat from the burn all over his body.

    Moral of the story: Wear sunscreen.


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