For decades, Americans have faced one shared, insurmountable conundrum: How can we reconcile our love of rap music with our insatiable lust for food?
It took longer than expected, but finally, the problem was solved when 2 Chainz released #MEALTIME, a digital cookbook that accompanied his second album, B.O.A.T.S. II: Me Time. The Georgia native paired a recipe with each track on the album, featuring everything from crab cakes to sauteed asparagus to pan-seared sea bass.
While Ja Rule appears to be next up, penning a microwave-centric cookbook based on his time in prison, that does not mean other rappers can’t explore the culinary world.
To get you primed for the next big trend in hip-hop and home cooking, we’ve assembled a list featuring some of the game’s most prominent talents and what kinds of dishes you can expect from them in the near future.
Snoop Dogg: Baked Goods
Considering he's endorsed a vaporizer, promoted products through Overstock.com, hocked Hot Pockets with Kate Upton and opened up his own line of dog food, it's legitimately surprising that Snoop Dogg hasn't published his own cookbook.
With a storied career and one ill–conceived reggae reincarnation under his belt, Tha Doggfather has plenty of experience to draw on for Baked Goods, but in all likelihood he’ll wind up drawing on the same inspiration that has guided his dozen solo albums: "The Chronic."
Expect to see Snoop push the boundaries of what can and can’t be covered in Funyuns or cereal as he offers a slate of easy to prepare meals that taste best after 3 a.m.
Be warned though, extensive use of Baked Goods is linked to short-term memory loss, paranoia, fatigue and cottonmouth.
Kendrick Lamar: good cook, f.O.O.d City
Despite being potentially the most important rapper alive today, it’s more than likely that Lamar has plenty of time on his hands – at least, whenever he’s not dissing every other rapper in existence.
Much like his critically acclaimed debut album, good cook, f.O.O.d City is largely inspired by Lamar’s childhood in the rough neighborhood of Compton, Calif.
GCFC will be with Compton staples, which K-Dot manages to seamlessly integrate with more upscale items that reflect his newfound success. The Church’s Chicken Cordon Bleu is a particular standout.
While good cook, f.O.O.d. City should be a little tough to digest for the uninitiated, it’s a culinary experience well worth your time and effort.
As Lamar would say, it’s “Five-star dishes, food for thought, bitches.”
Jay Z and Kanye West: No Cooks in the Wild
Much like their album Watch the Throne, Jay Z and Kanye West will happily sell you their product and then brag the entire time about their outsized wealth. In No Cooks in the Wild, the only thing to match each rapper’s excess ego is the price of the ingredients.
Of course, Jigga and ‘Ye aren’t above making staple foods. Look for standards, like a basic omelette – made, of course, with Fabergé and extinct Dodo bird eggs.
Given their recent efforts, be sure to look for individual chapters that reflect their latest output. From Mr. West, look for Cheezus, filled with fast-baking secrets from some of the finest French-ass restaurants on the planet.
For Mr. Beyoncé Knowles himself, expect the chapter based on his latest album, Magna Carta... Holy Grail, to serve up dishes bland and forgettable.
Drake: Feed Me Later
Mr. Aubrey Graham has rocketed to success in the last five years, using his sad-rap persona to mope his way to the top. With his latest album, Nothing Was the Same, Drake raised the bar in the rap game. Now, with Feed Me Later, he’s poised to do the same in the kitchen.
Esteemed scholars have estimated that Drake spends approximately 70 percent of his day crying. With that in mind, Feed Me Later should feature plenty of onion-based dishes, likely one of the man’s favorite ingredients. Not only that, but expect plenty of meals for one, considering the cook has no new friends to be inviting over for dinner parties. Of course, no meal is complete with dessert, and Chef Drake is pleased to serve up pound cake.
Das Racist: Das Foodie
If Das Racist (R.I.P.) were to write a cookbook, it would be simple.
Step One: Go to Pizza Hut.
Step Two: Go to Taco Bell.
Step Three: Wonder why you don’t see your friends there.
Step Four: Realize they’re at the Combination Pizza Hut and Taco Bell.
It’s that simple.