No, you did your trademark screeching noise you reserve only for emergencies when you found out Lifetime is making a movie about Meghan Markle and Prince Harry’s romance.
OK, so it was I who did the screeching, but can you blame me? In sixth grade, I stayed up all night to watch Will and Kate’s wedding (which you can bet caused me to knock tf out in keyboarding class the next day) and anxiously awaited the announcements of Prince George’s and Princess Charlotte’s births. I am the reason for at least four of the views on the various segments of William and Kate: The Movie on YouTube – before its subsequent addition to and removal from Netflix. You can imagine my excitement over this new installment in the royal family cinematic universe, especially considering Meghan is a fellow Wildcat and wonderful human.
And now, Lifetime has announced the actors who will star as Meghan and Harry, Parisa Fitz-Henley and Murray Fraser – but not before I made my own personal list of who could play the royal couple. In honor of Meghan and Harry getting their own love story preserved forever in the glory of a cheesy film, here are some of my could-have-beens:
Zawe Ashton: I wasn’t super familiar with Ashton before looking into actresses I thought would be good for the movie, but so many photos of her totally strike me as Meghan. She’s known for the British dramadies Not Safe for Work and Fresh Meat. She would have to work on her American accent, but she wouldn’t have been the first!Kat Graham: Maybe it’s the former (OK … current) Vampire Diaries stan in me, but I will support Graham in whatever she does, be it musical endeavors or voice-acting in a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles series. Seeing her as Meghan would’ve warmed my 2009 fangirl heart.
Domhnall Gleeson: Before he was creepy General Hux in the Star Wars franchise, he was Tim Lake in About Time (an exquisite romcom featuring Margot Robbie and time travel) and Bill Weasley in the Harry Potter series. These past roles prove he can be a ruthless villain, dorky lawyer or cool, curse-breaking wizard. His range would’ve been useful in the role of Harry, who is actually a complex human being, regardless of what the public seems to forget.
Rupert Grint: Yes, I understand the cliche of the British ginger and that this is the second Weasley brother to appear on this list, but it’s called a DREAM cast for a reason, thanks! There’s something so familiar about Grint’s acting - probably because we all basically grew up with him. He could’ve played Harry’s charisma quite well.
Carson Wentz: By now I am sure it’s clear that I care more about the casting of Meghan than Harry, as most men all look the same to me. Lacking inspiration, I turned to the internet, and thought it should be noted that many people have pointed out the similarities between recent Super Bowl winner Carson Wentz and the British prince. Now that he has that ring, maybe he’ll quit sports and pursue Prince Harry impersonations in the future?
Lifetime might’ve beaten me to punch on releasing the cast list, but there are no hard feelings here. I get another movie to add to my list of instant classics. They get lots of money from ad revenue, presumably. Everybody wins.