Facing the airborne seeds of mid-quarter anxiety

    It’s that time of spring when all of the formerly innocuous yellow dandelions are turning into highly annoying, sneeze-inducing pollen puff balls. This week, we scowled when the airborne seeds of the week floated past our noses and the little annoyances of middle-of-the-quarter anxiety showed up.

    It all started with Cinco de Mayo. As a holiday understood by college students simply as the day that dining halls serve lukewarm fajitas and that students get an excuse to drink in the middle of the week, the fifth of May has little to offer besides an extra-crowded night at The Keg and the bastardization of a Mexican holiday. As a result, later that night many of the aforementioned lukewarm fajitas saw light again.

    The search is on for a new women’s basketball coach, as coach Beth Combs’s resignation was announced Wednesday. The Presidential Search Committee is also hard at work looking for Northwestern’s next Bienen. Why not kill two birds with one stone and get a basketball-coaching presidente? It would preferably be someone who could rake in the millions for our endowment through sneaker endorsements, but dare to dream.

    In an effort to end an annoyance, Northwestern professor Ernest Moore has been researching cures for tinnitus, a chronic ringing in the ears that affects thousands of war veterans. The professor has resorted to inducing ringing in the ears of zebrafish and testing their behavior. We can’t say for sure how the zebrafish feel about this particular imposition.

    AEISEC tried a new way of painting the Rock on Thursday, covering it with flags from countries around the world. Perhaps the flags shielded the Rock from the week’s schizo weather, or perhaps the group got the idea from the Ron Paul Rock from a few months ago. Oh Ronnie, you must be at it again!

    And the Office of the Registrar, always several steps ahead of us, has already posted classes for Fall Quarter on CAESAR. But as far as this week was concerned, registration is the last thing on our mind since we’re still deciding whether to drop that GPA-sabotaging class before the week is over.

    Hopefully by next week the fuzzy dandelion balls will be gone, along with the mid-quarter slump.


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