One of my friends was recently bemoaning the fact that her and her boyfriend hadn’t had sex in over a week. Seeing that she usually has a healthy sex life, I was perplexed by this dry spell. Did they have a fight? Were they too busy? Had he gotten seriously kneed in the balls?
Well, no, she admitted. It was just “that time of the month” again.
I understand the rationale behind not having sex on your period. It’s messy, you feel unattractive and bloated, and blood freaks some people out. But this girl was nearly ravenous with sexual tension – and for no valid reason except being on the rag.
According to her, it was just something you didn’t do. I couldn’t really figure out if she thought it was gross or if her boyfriend was the problem, but she made clear that having sex on her period was completely out of the question.
Call me crazy, but it’s just blood. You deal with all sorts of other bodily fluids when you’re having sex, so why not that, too? What makes blood any more disgusting than, say, semen? I bet if men had periods it’d be a matter of pride rather than embarrassment: “Dude, I bled all over this girl last night! And it was so hot!”
Are guys really that grossed out by blood, or do we just think they are? I think given the option, most guys would rather get laid. Besides, they think bleeding from a cut is super hardcore, so why should it be any different when it comes from a vag?
And, please, enough of this “periods are gross” business. Bodies are gross. Sex is gross. Let’s get over it and move on.
Once you get past the taboo factor, sex on your period actually has all sorts of benefits. Orgasms are good for cramps. There’s extra lubrication. And the swing of hormones might mean that you’re extra horny.
So if you do decide to do the nasty when Aunt Flow’s visiting, just make sure you remember the following:
- Avoid mess. Wait until your heaviest days are over. Put down old towels (or buy black sheets!). Pick positions where you can lie on your back. You can also use menstrual cups that fit over your cervix to stop the flow while you’re getting down.
- Protect yourself. Some guys would rather use a condom during period sex, simply for the barrier it provides. But unless both of you have been tested and are monogomous, condoms a good idea anyways since you can still get sexually transmitted diseases from having sex on your period. Some STDs, especially HIV and herpes, are actually easier for a guy to contract from a girl who’s on her period. And don’t forget to use a dental dam – or a condom cut in half – for oral sex, unless you have vampire tendencies. You can also use a tampon to avoid overflow during oral sex.
- Use birth control. Although it’s less likely, you can still get pregnant on your period. Semen can live for several days, and if you happen to ovulate in that time frame, you could get pregnant. Note: It’s okay to have sex during the week-long break at the end of a pack of birth control pills (the week you get your period). Just make sure you continue to take it after the end of that week to prevent ovulation.
Just remember: If you don’t have sex during your period, that’s almost a week of celibacy every month. And would you really rather be celibate for a fourth of your life than have sex on your period?